World War Zzzzzz

Posted in Reviews by - Jul 13, 2013
World War Zzzzzz

World War Z has a PG 13 rating basically meaning it presents a santitised version of the zombie genre that you could even take your kids and grandmother along to see, if you so wished.

The movie certainly had a few memorable scenes which were worth seeing, such as a zombie anthill trying to breech Israel’s security wall, as well as zombies besieging a helicopter, or the nerve-rattling jumbo jet sequence.

Nevertheless, the zombies of World War Z would make Hussain Bolt look like he was standing still and oddly enough were not interested in dinner but only in having a quick …

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The Last Stand (2013) is The Last Straw

Posted in Reviews by - Jul 08, 2013

Ray Owens (Arnold Schwarzenegger), the Sheriff of a sleepy border town where nothing ever happens, somehow ends up making a stand against vicious international drug lord Gabriel Cortez, who has to pass through his town with his army of goons in order to make it across the border to Mexico.

That’s the premise for this shaky movie which then transforms into a trade fair for arms manufacturers and weapons enthusiasts, alike. However, no matter how many bullets are fired by the cartel, they hadn’t factored in the now leathery, impervious hide of  the ageing sheriff  or the fact his already coagulated …

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Blindness (2008) Is Also Dumb

Posted in Reviews by - Jun 27, 2013

Blindness is a bit like Day Of The Triffids, only without the Triffids or a story for that matter. Basically, out of the blue almost everyone goes blind and we then watch people bumping into things for a the next punishing two hours before the final dreary romp home.

Meanwhile, empty a few litter bins onto the street and its the end of the world, and throw in some shaky camera work and piano music while you’re at it and you have an art house production, apparently. Its as simple as that!

Ultimately, Blindness is an exhaustively indulgent apocalyptic drama which will …

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The Host (2013): A 60′s Style Sci-Fi Cheesefest

Posted in Reviews by - Jun 16, 2013

In The Host a force of polite alien ‘Souls’  take over and occupy the human race, Invasion of the Body Snatchers style, while streamlining human systems so that they run marginally more efficiently. This apparently involves everyone wearing white  suits, driving around in silver chromed Lotus sports cars, and not having to pay for their shopping at Costco.

As so many alien invaders have failed to do in the past, however, they made the fatal mistake of not reckoning on the remarkable resilience Earthlings have compared to all other intelligent lifeforms, and above all mankind’s apparently unique concept of LOVE. Presumably, …

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Star Trek Into Darkness (2013)

Posted in Reviews by - Jun 06, 2013

I would put Star Trek (2009) on my list of top 10 movies set in outer space, but J.J. Abrams’ follow up to his original offering certainly does not disappoint and is easily on a par with its predecessor . As soon as Star Trek Into Darkness begins you are instantly engaged with the characters, and the action rocks forward at a great pace from beginning to end. The action scenes are visually stunning, the plot a clever twist on the original Khan tale, while the exchanges and humour between the main characters was always entertaining.

I watched this movie in …

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A Good Day to Die Hard (2013) Sucks Hard With A Vengeance

Posted in Reviews by - Jun 02, 2013

In ‘A Good Day to Die Hard (2013)’ it is fair to say that John McClane dies harder than ever before. Maybe even more than all the previous Die Hard movies put together, although its difficult to say with any great certainty as I only vaguely recall the others and a little while after watching ‘A Good Day to Die Hard’ I’m fast forgetting what this movie was about, too.

Suffice to say I remember bullets being fired, bombs going off and Bruce Willis wrecking half of Moscow while meeting out bloody genocide indiscriminately on the Russian people.

Of course the Ruskies …

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Chronicles Of Riddick (2004): An Epic Of Chronic Proportions

Posted in Reviews by - May 24, 2013

This movie should really have been called; ‘The Chronic Of Ridiculousness.’ I enjoyed Vin Diesel in ‘XXX’ and ‘Pitch Dark, but this time around his monotone and monotonous acting slowed down the movie to such an extent you could actually feel time moving in reverse.

Unfortunately, in the ‘Chronicles Of Riddick’ Vin Diesel got into his hard man role so much that the only lighter parts of the movie comes when, for some reason, he doesn’t kill someone but merely maims them instead. Not so lucky though, 15 minutes or so into the movie, when Riddick takes out a small battalion …

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